Sunday, December 23, 2012

That Reminds Me

Sometimes exploring balloon fetish forums and monitoring Tweets that mention balloon fetishes makes me think of something I should have remembered, but didn't. For example, a recent Tweet that started out being about the show Strange Sex turned out to be from someone who once dated a balloon fetishist.

It was one of those "duh!" moments when I realized that I hadn't even thought about attempting to interview partners and former partners, not to mention friends and family, of balloon fetishists. But it's an important part of the story. How we share, or choose not to share, our fetish depends a lot on the reactions those around us have to balloons and, assuming they know about them, our feelings toward balloons.

And so I'm asking for stories and opinions for anyone out there who is or has been the partner of a balloon fetishist, or knows one as a friend or family member. I want to know how you feel about it, what if any problems it's caused, how you cope if you do. And although this book is written by a balloon fetishist, sympathetic to my fellow fetishists, I'm also looking for the truth of the matter, because understanding this special love we have for balloons is not going to be the results of painting it in the best of all possible lights. It will come from telling the facts as they are, as best I can.

And while I'm thinking about it, I'd also like to hear from fetish models who do balloon pictures and videos, phone sex workers who have dealt with balloon fantasies with customers, and prostitutes who have indulged balloon fantasies. Everything is completely anonymous, of course.

If I'm going to do this, I should get the whole picture.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Collecting Stories

I have already gotten a few emails from balloon fetishists telling me how their fetish started, and what they like to do with balloons, and what other fetishes (if any) they have, and I can already, at this early stage in the process, discern two important facts:

First, I really have my work cut out for me. These stories are detailed and intimate and open and honest, but they elicit even more questions. And I think I have only gotten a tiny hint, even with all the years I've spent in online forums with other balloons fetishists, of the enormous variety of interests and experiences that I am going to be exposed to.

Second, this is going to be a fascinating experience. Even over the course of reading just these few emails, I have found myself thinking things like, "I never thought of that," and "I thought he was leading to something just like my own experiences, until he said that."

I think that by the time I have finished researching this book, I will have changed a lot of my own conceptions about what it is to be a balloon fetishist, in ways I never imagined. And while I usually start a book or story with some idea of what the end product will look like, I have a feeling that for this book, the final form will bear little resemblance to what is currently in my head.

It might be the most interesting writing experience I've ever had.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

I'm Writing Another Book

I was considering writing a sequel to Blowing It! after letting that first novel find its audience, perhaps in a year or two, because although I have made less money per hour as a balloon-fetish novelists than at any other pursuit aside from, perhaps, taking online surveys, the fact is that I have come to love my characters enough to think that they deserve to live on beyond the one book.

What I absolutely did not intend to do was write a factual book about balloon fetishes. I am no expert, beyond having a balloon fetish myself and the reading I've done, not so much of academic studies and papers, but of correspondence and online postings from the balloon community at large. And that does not give me any deep understanding of the causes of, or the details about, the wide variety of balloon fetishes in the world.

But then along comes Taboo from National Geographic. And Strange Sex on Netflix. And then thinking back to the few times others outside actual participants in balloon fetishism have tried to portray us as if they had a firm grasp of the facts and feelings of our fetish—and failing utterly. Branding us with cute names like "looners," and dividing us into neat categories like "poppers," "non-poppers," and "semi-poppers," as if we are so easily defined.

And worse yet, using the most far-fetched psychological (psycho-illogical?) theories to explain why we feel what we feel, and what balloons represent to us, and passing themselves off as experts. Do you realize the "expert" that Taboo featured is a journalism student?

And so, to combat this nonsense, I am writing a factual book, Not a comprehensive look at balloon fetishism, not an attempt to explain, but an attempt to show the human side of our special fetish, to show some of the great variety of both people and balloon interests. And to dispel some of what has been said about us in other media.

Will I succeed? The only way for me to find out is to write, publish, and wait. You, on the other hand, can help. If you have a balloon fetish, and would like to give me some of the information I need to achieve a realistic and sympathetic (and non-sensational) portrayal of people who love balloons, then drop me a line at and let's start a dialogue.

Don't look for this book in a month. Maybe a year if I'm lucky. But I feel strongly enough that I really don't care how long it takes. At this point it's a book that's begging me to write it.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Corrections Complete (I Hope)

The corrections to the Kindle edition took far less time than I though they would, thanks to the ease of editing HTML in SubEthaEdit. The corrected Kindle edition is now available. The print edition is available through CreateSpace, but may take a couple of days to become available again on

With luck I'd found all the errors, and Blowing It! will now be a smoother read.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Corrections, Step One

I have submitted what I hope is the final edition of Blowing It! to CreateSpace to correct the many typographical errors. For up to 48 hours (though in my experience with CS more likely less than 12) the print edition will not be available.

Next step is to correct the Kindle edition, which takes longer because I have to edit the HTML files to avoid changing any of the formatting adjustments I made. But I will be working on it daily until it's done, and I'll post when it's submitted.

Thank you all for your patience and kind words about the book. After I've corrected this book, I have another one coming up. Not the suggested sequel (sorry, not yet), but something else.

But that's a subject for another post.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Not a Bestseller, But ...

I just noticed today that Blowing It! rose from being ranked around 350,000th among Kindle paid books to 61,588th. And that's from selling all of two copies in the past day. Which means that although my book is by no means a bestseller, it tops an awful lot of other titles in the Kindle catalog.

There may be hope for me yet!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Time To Breathe

The novel has been out for a few months now. I have sold more than 20 copies, and given away 170. Now that there are people out there reading the book, it's time for me to let it go.

Blowing It! is not the kind of book you can shout out to the world about. It has a very small potential audience of people interested in balloons sexually, or interested in people who are interested in balloons. So it's basically time for me to let the book take on a life of its own, whatever that life might be.

I'll be here to fulfill orders if needed, and I am now going to dive in and correct all those typographical errors I alluded to earlier (I would have sooner, but my only printed copy of the book was with my wife, who has finally finished reading it).

And then I'll let it go, go on to other book projects that I can tell anyone and everyone that I wrote, and that may have larger readerships, though only time will tell.

Perhaps Blowing It! will catch on widely enough in fetish circles to make me think about going back to do the sequel. Perhaps not. But I'm still very happy that I wrote the book and went through the self-publishing process. I've learned a lot.

And if you are one of the almost-200 people who have read the book, I hope that I have created something that was worth your time, and that you'll eventually find a way to let me know.

And, straight from the heart, I want to say "thank you."

Saturday, September 15, 2012

I've Got Readers

At least, I've got downloaders. I've given away, as of this writing, 137 copies of the Kindle edition of Blowing It! and there's still some 16 hours left on the promotion. It will be interesting to see what happens in the time that follows, if I really do sell more books after the free promotion than I sold before.

If you are one of the nice people who downloaded my book in the last couple of days, you can help. Review it on Amazon, talk about it in the balloon forums, leave comments here on the blog. Even if you didn't like the book, just talk about it.

And if you haven't downloaded the book yet, there's still time to get it for free. Right here.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Giving It Away

It was a strange feeling to wake up this morning, go to my Kindle app, and search the store for "Balloon Fetish," and find my book listed at $0.00. Am I doing the right thing? Others who have tried free promos say that their sales increased after a free promo. I just want lots of people to read my book, because that's why I wrote it.

But if I can't even give it away ... no, that's just author's paranoia setting in. I've already given away four books, and the promo has just gotten started.

So, click here and have a good read. But hurry, because it's only free until midnight tomorrow (PDT).

And review, please. It doesn't have to be a good review, just an honest one.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Free Book, But Don't Blow It!

Blowing It! will be available for free from the Amazon Kindle Store, but only on Friday, September 14th and Saturday, September 15th 2012. Download, read, and tell me what you think! And then tell everyone else!

Click here!

Monday, August 13, 2012

Interesting Stuff I Find

As I said in my last post, I look around every now and then to see if my book is getting any wider exposure. And I notice interesting things. Like the fact that the book is listed in a couple of sites carrying textbooks. Hmm. Wonder what class my book would be used for? A little specific (and for that matter fictional) for Human Sexuality, I would think. And my ego isn't big enough to think that my book would form any part of a writing class.

Another thing is that several of the pages that show my book for sale have sharing buttons for the various social media. Now, I have a Twitter account for myself as fetish author, but Blowing It! does not have, for example, its own Facebook page, and is unlikely to anytime in the future. I think of Facebook as a place for people to be themselves with their real friends, and not so much a place to share their most intimate secrets (although from some of the posts I see, others might have a different opinion).

In any case, if you come across the book and hit the Facebook Like button, be forewarned that whatever you are liking has nothing to do with me.

Of course, as I have written before, promoting a pseudonymously written erotic novel is not easy, and so anything you can do to share with someone who might also be interested is much appreciated. But I don't expect you to go so far as to out yourself on Facebook. 

Monday, August 6, 2012

Pricey Options

Every once in awhile, I Google the search terms "Blowing It!" and "Tim Popper" together to see if anyone has got around to mentioning my book. And pretty much the only reviews I find are the one on Amazon, and reposts on various sales outlets of the blurbs I wrote myself. Most of these I initiated, and almost as many are automatically generated. But I got a couple of fascinating hits.

For one thing, there is a seller selling my book on Barnes & Noble. For $19.95. Plus shipping, I expect. Please, folks, don't waste your money. This seller is taking a gigantic markup, and I don't get any extra royalties, so you may as well buy the book from, or if you want to send a little extra my way, by the hard copy from the link on the blog, which links to CreateSpace.

Another hit was a site selling books to buyers in South Africa for 269 rand. That's about 32 bucks! Now, I don't know how import restrictions come into this, but something tells me that if a South African buyer can get it through some offshoot of, he might make out a little better.

If anyone knows, I would be delighted to hear.

I want everyone who's interested in balloon fetishism to read the novel. But I don't want them to pay more than they need to!

Sunday, July 29, 2012


It won't be the first time that balloon fetishism has been presented on national television. I know of at least two other segments, the most recent on Strange Sex. But when National Geographic does something, you expect a nice, straightforward, factual account.

But if the preview on NG's YouTube channel is any indication, the upcoming episode of "Taboo" will be the most sensationalized, and misleading, portrayal of balloon fetishism I've yet seen.

The preview features Dave from Arkansas, who doesn't pop his balloons or, according to Dave, have sex with them. I don't know if I'd even categorize that as "fetish," but who am I to split hairs. The fact is, I've managed to find out a bit more about Dave than that little clip; he has posted and commented on YouTube in the past.

He has strong feelings about popping balloons, but he comes across in his YouTube persona as a pretty nice guy, and no stranger than many other people I see on the Internet. In fact, a whole lot less strange than some.

But at the hands of the folks at National Geographic, he comes across as really, really creepy. Even the music they edit into the end of the segment makes him seem completely bizarre. This is just sensationalist crap, and unworthy of anything that bears the National Geographic name.

I am swayed toward the view expressed by Tim Popper in the afterword of his novel. He talks about there not really being a single balloon fetish, but a huge variety of fetishes that happen to involve balloons. And the more I see other balloon lovers talk about their particular likes and dislikes, the more I think that this is true.

Dave, as unfairly portrayed in this hideous video, does not represent the panoply of balloon fetishes. But then, no single one of us could. It's bad enough that people who know nothing about us write term papers and magazine articles. But to use the most blatant tricks of the motion picture trade to make us all look truly insane is beneath contempt.

And it makes me cringe even more to hear the term "looner."

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Need Some Advice

I want people to be able to buy "Blowing It!" in a more private way. You know, not have a telltale charge show up on a credit card statement and have a significant other ask questions.

I'm considering using PayPal and making an ePub version of the book available via email. Do you think PayPal is private enough? Is there some other method that's both secure and private? I could also offer a print copy of the book, although if it was ordered through me, I would have to charge about $4 extra to cover the additional shipping step (and I wouldn't be able to offer that option outside the US).

I'd really like to make more people comfortable buying this book. I know that, although erotic fiction (like erotic images and video) in general is now more widely acceptable, fetish fiction is still a much more private sphere of many people's lives. I'd appreciate any advice on how I can make buying this book a little easier.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

New Prices Are In Effect on

The new prices have propagated through the system, and now appear on I hope the lower price will encourage you to read my book and recommend it to your balloon-loving friends. Enjoy!

Friday, June 29, 2012

Preview Now Available at

A preview of the print edition of the book is now available on You can see the first chapter of the book, a random page or two from the middle, and the last couple of pages. I suggest you give it a try; when I did, I got to some of the fun balloon stuff in the middle of the book.

Let me know what you think!

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Learning To Promote

Now that I've written a book, if I want to sell it, I have to: (1) tell enough people that it exists, and (2) convince them that it is worth parting with four or eight bucks to obtain and however much of their life it takes them to read it.

Promoting a fetish book that's written under a pseudonym is an interesting challenge. Since my friends don't know about my fetish, and probably don't know anyone else with a balloon fetish (or at least they don't know that they know anyone), I can't well go to my Facebook page and announce the book to the world (although I often feel like it; it's so exciting that it's really hard to keep quiet).

I've had, as of this writing, nearly 1,000 page hits here at the blog, but only 9 copies of the book sold (all though, and all but one a Kindle edition). That's about a 1% turnover rate, which isn't horrible, but isn't exactly going to make my little book a blockbuster either.

Not that it needs to be, but I would be happy if more people were interested in reading it.

I've created a page at a book review site called Ask David. I don't yet know whether it will bring any business my way; it takes up to three weeks for the page to be created. It looks like a pretty busy place, though, so I'm hopeful.

I did get my very first review on (Thanks Carlos!): five stars, and a glowing review. But it won't do me any good unless a potential reader sees it. So, the other eight of you who bought the book, can you do me a favor and review and rate it? I appreciate it.

And if any of you are affiliates, and really like the book, and have a fetish-related site or blog (my, that's a lot of ifs, isn't it), I'd love you to include an affiliate link to the book. After all, you'll make a little money, too, if I do.

And one more favor (I ask a lot, don't I?): if you see the book mentioned anywhere besides this blog or, would you drop me a line and let me know? My address is If you forget to write in down, it's also in the Afterword of the book.

Hint, hint.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

A Balloon Fetish Book

There is a now a novel featuring two balloon fetishists as the main characters. It is entitled "Blowing It!" and you can read more about it at this blog.

I wouldn't say that this book represents globophilia coming into the mainstream, but it is an interesting turn of events, and probably one that was inevitable. After all, there have been many balloon stories published on the 'Net over the years, and there was one guy (I assume a guy, though the author is just JC Fetish) who did a balloon fetish chapter in something called the "Book of Fetishes" (although I found his understanding of balloon fetishes, and the origins of fetishes in general, profoundly lacking).

This book was written pseudonymously, by someone who calls himself Tim Popper (Timid Popper in the forums where he, occasionally, posts). It's not a long book at 132 pages, but it seems to be just long enough for the story. I think it's worth a look.

If you like it, do the author a favor and rate it on Amazon or at least post a comment in his blog. Being an author, especially in a narrow niche like this one, can be really lonely. It's like sending your baby out into the world and holding your breath to see what the world thinks.

Even if you don't like it, give him some feedback. Maybe he'll write more.

(And by the way, I've noticed that none of you has commented on this blog either. What does a guy have to do, post something really insulting? Just sayin'!)

Face Palm

I just received my first copy of the published version of Blowing It! and, of course, I found a mistake right on the back cover. I've accidentally claimed that this is the first book-length work of erotic fiction. Punctuation error. It should read:

Blowing It! just might be the first book length work of erotic fiction written by a real balloon fetishist.

The rest of the copy is the same as the header of the blog, except that I misspelled "separate." Good thing I don't currently rely on the back cover to sell the book (since you can't buy it in bookstores). At some point I will make the correction, but it pulls the book off the market for a day or so, and so I think it can wait.

Of course, nobody is perfect, and I expect that, at some point, readers will begin sending me many other grammatical and typographical errors they find in the book.

But right on the back cover? Sheesh!

Friday, June 22, 2012

One More Step

Blowing It! print edition is now available on That's my last publishing milestone for awhile. Now it's up to you, dear readers: read, review, and recommend.
And let me know what you think.
I'm all ears.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

CreateSpace Preview Available

You can preview the first chapter of Blowing It! by clicking HERE. I hope the first chapter will give you the flavor of the book and encourage you to read on.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Kindle Edition Available!

Blowing It! is now a Kindle book. I was up late last night struggling with the inline CSS in my book's file, but it was worth it to see all the chapter breaks and font changes preserved in the Kindle edition.

If you search the kindle store for "balloon fetish," mine is one of only two titles to show up (the other is a short book excerpt called "Blow Me"), so it's really easy to find.

And another benefit of the Kindle edition is that you can preview the first chapter (actually a bit more than the first chapter) online before you buy the book. I think I can do that on Amazon, too, but not until the book is available through that channel. (I check Amazon every day looking for the book to show up there—soon!)


Monday, June 18, 2012

For Mobile Users

First, I just got around to looking at this blog on mobile and realized that the link at the top of the page is missing in the mobile version. So, HERE IT IS.

Second, I'm struggling with Kindle formatting. But once I get it right, I'll be published for Kindle, and then I'll see about epub for those of you who don't have Kindle readers or apps. Might still get it done before the end of the night (lots of HTML/CSS twiddling).

Sunday, June 17, 2012

It's a Book!

I have approved the proof of Blowing It! and it is now for sale in book form from the link at the top of this blog. It will also be available through in about a week. I have a little formatting work to do for the Kindle edition, but I'm going to try to wrap that up tomorrow and see how quickly I can get to the eBook market.

I hope you enjoy the book. Let me hear what you think!

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Almost There

Marked up the proof, corrected the file, and uploaded the new version. In about 48 hours, I should get the okay for another proof. This time I have the confidence to review the electronic proof, which should take less than a day, and then Blowing It! will be available for sale.

For those considering self-publishing, by the way, I highly recommend physical proof copies of your book before you go to press. They make correction much easier. Of course, if you are doing an eBook, you don't have the option, but you can always print out physcial pages. Expensive, but worth it.

My proof copy, on the other hand, cost less than $10 shipped, and I got it in less than a week. Thanks to that, I am nearly ready, just weeks from finishing writing the book, to go to press.

I hope you enjoy it!

Friday, June 15, 2012


I am holding in my hot little hands the very first printed copy of Blowing It! It was sent to me by CreateSpace, the service I am using to publish the book, and it is a proof copy.

I cannot describe to you the thrill of holding a book in your hands that you wrote, a real book that you can lie in bed and read. Something with all the elements of a book you'd buy in the store or borrow at the library: covers, title pages, and even an ISBN bar code. It has everything.

Including mistakes, and formatting problems, and little missing touches that I didn't realize were missing until I got hold of the book. It's the magic of the proof, a chance to see it all in book form but still make the changes I need to make before anyone else gets to see it.

The physical book makes this easier. I can read the book online, but I can't mark it up as I go with bold strokes and notes that I can refer to when it comes time to correct the electronic edition that was the original form of creation of the book.

That's my task over the next few days. And when I've done that, I'll send another file to the ether that will become the real book, the one you can buy and read. And while I'm waiting for approval of that, I'll prepare the Kindle edition, so that those of you who don't want to wait, or pay, or make room, for a physical edition can (I hope) enjoy my book, too.

Time to get out my red pencil!

Sunday, June 10, 2012

The Birth Of a Book

I just sent for a proof copy of what I think may be the first ever novel-length work of erotic fiction to feature two balloon fetishists as main characters.

Henry Wilson is an ordinary guy, a video editor in the Central Valley of California, married to a teacher, with two grown children. He happens to have a fetish for toy balloons.

As does a pretty young waitress who works in a diner near Henry's office. Her name is Melanie McConnell. She's a gorgeous redhead who loves to play with and pop balloons for her sexual pleasure.

To find out how these two manage to connect, and what happens when they do, you'll have to read Blowing It! when it hits the market in about two weeks. The printed edition will be available through or Createspace (link coming when it's available), and a Kindle edition should be coming right on top of the print version.

And if anything interesting comes out of the publication if this book, I'll be sure to write about it here.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Balloons In Public

Seeing balloons in public places can present several problems for this globophile, although not the problems you might expect. No, I do not get a hard-on when I see balloons tied to the antennae of cars in a sales lot. I don't even get a hard-on when I see a pretty girl blowing up a balloon to decorate a store. Not even when I saw my lovely wife sit on a balloon and pop it for the first time ever while playing a game at a picnic.

Now, I did get a hard-on later, in bed with her, thinking about her sitting on the balloon, but not at the time. I can't honestly call it monumental self-control; the situation just seems to sort itself out in the moment. Were I lucky enough to watch, say, some exotic dancer doing all kinds of intimate play with balloons during an adult show, my restraint might go all to hell. But I haven't been lucky enough to test that theory yet.

No, revealing my sexual interest in balloons is not the big problem with encountering balloons in public places, but there are a few uncomfortable aspects.

First, although I am turned on by balloons getting popped, I am also afraid of it, and embarrassed at the prospect of revealing my fear. Oddly, it is not the odd unexpected pop that is likely to cause that problem—I've gotten past that many times without too much trouble—but the anticipation of a pop, the build up of tension where I start to show just how cowardly I can be. While a balloon is being blown up close to me, or when someone is handling a balloon roughly or getting it too close to something sharp or hot. If I see it coming, I'm a mess.

And what's really disturbing to me is that it's the same tension that, under the right circumstances, can be one of my biggest turn-ons. Not the hot or sharp objects, mind you, but the overinflation or the bouncing around on a balloon to make it pop. But if I can't control the situation, with some kind of hearing protection or a chance to keep my distance or beat a hasty retreat without embarrassment, then I can actually break out in a sweat over the threat of a balloon popping.

Conversely, if I come across a situation where a lot of balloons are being popped, like someone cleaning up decorations at the end of a party or store sale, using pushpins or scissors, I usually (although it's rare that I am present for such an event) don't feel afraid. But I do feel very disappointed at the waste, and I am not comfortable with staying around to watch.

But, truthfully, although those are the situations I think most about, I encounter balloons much more often in situations where there is little chance of any of them popping. Then some of my other, less sexual and more emotional, feelings start to kick in.

Take the situation of balloons tied to cars. I want them. I want to steal them all before they get ruined by the sun or pop on the hot roof of the car or just got destroyed without appreciation at the end of the day by some salesman with scissors. I feel they same way about all kinds of balloon decorations when I see them; I just want to have them and play with them and pop them in a way that has meaning to me.

If I see that a store has balloons that are imprinted with their logo, I want to get some uninflated ones for later play. I was much braver about asking for this when I was young and single. Actually, I was pretty brave about asking for inflated balloons to rescue them from destruction in my youth as well. Come to think of it, I was also lucky enough to own a van to bring them home in then, too.

Occasionally, I see balloons in some kind of contact with a pretty woman, and it makes me crave some sexual balloon activity, not with that particular woman, but with my own wife. But, unfortunately, there is little opportunity for such play in our house now, and so the craving goes unfulfilled most of the time.

Which brings on that strange psychological phenomenon, where you start thinking you are just being surrounded by the one thing that is on your mind the most. After one encounter with a pretty woman recently, who had balloons floating in her area at a hair salon in such a way that she would brush against them a lot, with her butt, when she was working on a client, I suddenly seemed to see balloons everywhere I looked, in stores, in car lots that don't often have them, at the local church bake sale. And it just makes me want to have my kind of fun with balloons all the more.

Unfortunately, it doesn't increase the actual chances that such fun will, in fact, happen.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Hoarding Balloons

I know this isn't true of all globophiles, but I have a tendency to keep buying balloons even though I have more than I can possible use, especially given that I live with wife and kids and have very little private time to indulge my fetish. I seem to have gotten over this to some extent in recent years, although I still find myself veering off to the party section at Wal-Mart when I shop there to see what they have in the way of balloons.

(The answer, if you're curious, is that they have 9- and 12-inch balloons, which are not horrible but not the best either; some are in bags of 72 and really quite reasonably priced. But I digress.)

I've managed not to buy too many balloons lately, but I still have a rather large stash in my nightstand drawer. Some are relatively recent purchases, from about a year and a half ago when I had the good fortune to be in a large city with a Qualatex Master Distributor. I bought a bag of 100 11-inch jewels and a bag of 50 16-inch jewels. These are for decorating and special occasions.

But I still had about a hundred balloons left that were beginning to get a little old and seemed like they might be kind of unreliable. So I made a promise to myself that, over the course of the current year, I would blow those balloons up and pop them.

You see, I can't just throw them away. It just doesn't feel right. Can't give them away, either. So for the past few months I have been making sure that I blow up and pop at least three balloons every week. It's not as easy as it sounds; I have very little privacy (from my kids; my wife is fine with it).

There was a time when I had a couple of thousand uninflated balloons in my possession. It made some sense before I had children, because I could blow up a hundred or more at a time for play and I would use them up in a reasonable amount of time. But once I became a Dad, the chances for that kind of play just fell by the wayside. But I kept accumulating balloons.

It took me about ten years, including a couple of moves, one across country, to pare my balloon hoard down to the size it is now. I'm surprised that some of the balloons can still be inflated with relative safely. I have some 36-inch balloons that are at least 15 years old, and they have been find so far (obviously, I don't manage to blow up anything that size three times a week; those get used about once a year). I have some white balloons that go back even farther, and I've blown those up, bounced around on them, and actually found them hard to pop.

Pretty much all the old balloons that still hold up are made by Qualatex. I haven't been so lucky with other brands even after just a few years. Once my varied stash has been used up, the remaining balloons will be all Qualatex. I won't try to use those up quickly, but I won't keep them around for ten years, either.

Maybe I'll be able to do something more spectacular when the kids have left home.

If I'm still up to it.

Saturday, March 31, 2012

New-philes and True-philes

Now, I'm not trying to get into an argument about "real" fetishists, so don't get your panties in a bunch (unless you're into that, and then I say have fun). But there is a difference between someone who grew up with a fetish and someone who acquired it later in life.

I'm not saying that one is better than the other, or that somehow anyone who didn't attach themselves to their fetish object early in life doesn't really count. But I am saying that those whose philia is a result of childhood experiences will experience the fetish object differently than someone who came upon the fetish from adult experimentation.

For one thing, I think that lifelong Globophiles are less likely to have multiple fetishes, and further are more likely to have a fairly narrow range of what they find stimulating within the context of balloon activities. To use myself as an example, I think that my attachment to balloons first formed because I was afraid of balloons and horrified at losing them to popping. I formed a physical attachment to the way they felt against my skin, and spent a lot of time in contact with them. This all started before I can remember.

When I reached puberty, that physical contact got attached to sexual arousal, and I started to connect balloons and girls, getting a strong desire to see girls in intimate contact with balloons. Oddly, in my teens, I connected the close physical contact with watching girls sitting on balloons and popping them, and it became the main focus of my arousal. This was before I could tolerate popping balloons myself, but it got me thinking about it.

It wasn't until I was in my twenties that I started popping balloons, first experimenting with pins and such (just to get past the fear) but quickly moving to more intimate ways of popping them. Now, this sounds like a lot of changes, but after more than 50 years, my relationship with balloons really is narrowed to close contact (more watching women in close contact) and popping by close contact.

I also like blow-to-pop (by mouth), although I can't myself, and to tell the truth I've never understood why I like it. I find it arousing, but at the same time I feel like a chance for that intimate contact has been wasted.

My interest in balloons has not branched out to popping with pins, cigarettes, feet, fire, heat, overinflation by machine, lasers, or orange oil. I like to watch non-popping play, but somehow find it less satisfying without the pop, like sex without the orgasm. On the other hand, my in-person experiences with balloons rarely involve popping because my wife doesn't like to pop balloons.

I also haven't branched out to vinyl, latex clothing, or mylars, much less S&M, B&D, shoes, leather, furries, or any one of the other uncountable fetishes I've heard of. I'm not even that much into lingerie. For someone with sexual feelings toward an inanimate object, I really am not all that interested in experimentation.

And I get the feeling that there are a lot of people out there just like me. I don't mean people that have the same narrow set of interests—although that's certainly possible. I'm talking about people who have their own set of narrow interests. Like the poor souls who comment on YouTube videos of young ladies blowing up balloons: "Please pop with bare feet." They may gravitate toward all kind of balloons videos, but only in the hopes of seeing those uncovered feet pressing themselves firmly into the inflated latex until the inevitable, satisfying bang. It's what really turns them on. And it does absolutely nothing for me.

If you're one of those who's new to sex play with balloons, you probably try all kinds of different things, and while some turn you on more than others, I'll wager that what really get you going is the variety, the chance to do something different, and maybe even the chance to feel a little naughty doing something outside what's considered normal.

Maybe that's a fetish in itself, being sexually aroused by novelty. I wonder if it has a name. I'd love to hear some thoughts on this.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

And They Call Me Strange

When I go out on the Internet, looking for conversations about balloon fetishism, I see a lot of porn sites trying to cash in on us, a few reasonable articles, and more than a few comments like, "That's really messed up," or "you people are sick."

I don't expect anyone who does not have the fetish, or even a fetish (or at least one they will recognize as such) to understand, but it seems that an awful lot of venom is reserved for people like me who get turned on by balloons, as opposed to "mainstream" fetishes like BDSM and spanking and latex and even furry fetishism. (Does that one have its own term, equivalent to globophilia? It seems like it's every bit as common.)

I've even seen some of these fetishes used as subject matter on prime time network television, particularly in episodes of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. A dominatrix even appeared in multiple episodes as a very human and sympathetic character. In the same series (which does, after all, take place in Las Vegas), I have seen furries and infantilism and even fetishes for obese girls. I remember an episode of Picket Fences where the priest turned out to have a shoe fetish.

But the only references I have seen to balloon fetishes are in factual (if incompletely so) television, as with the series Strange Sex.

And yet our is such a harmless fetish! Maybe it's because people associate balloons with children, and so associate us with pedophiles. We are not pedophiles. The only connection between globophilia and childhood is that the roots of it, for most of us, go back way before puberty. But the sexual interest is very much an adult interest. And in case you hadn't noticed, adults play with balloons, too.

Maybe it's because we can get turned on by something that other people do without there being any sexual intent. Maybe the idea that, if you happen to be playing a balloon popping game at a party or on a game show or on a cruise that someone watching you might be getting hot because of it.

But we do things all the time that might be turning someone on. The clothes we wear—good grief, the shoes—any idea how common foot and shoe fetishes are? Men get turned on looking at attractive women all the time, and vice versa. What of it? It's not what we think about, or what makes us feel horny that counts. It's what we do about it. It's how we act.

And that is a matter of personal character. Not a matter of what one's particular turn-on is.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Not For Me To Say

I don't consider it my place to explain what globophilia is, or what it is not. I can describe what my particular brand of globophilia involves, what it makes me think, and how it makes me feel, to the best of my ability.

But it is a widely varied beast, this fetish, this attraction to a rubber bag filled with air. If you read other writers on the topic (yes, I'm not the only one, much to my own surprise), they will tell you about the fetish with some confidence, even as they oversimplify.

People with a balloon fetish, they will tell you, are called "looners." Well, some are, and bloggers and magazine writers and porn sites have picked up on the term. I can't stand it. It's flippant and silly and makes us sound crazy. Having strong sexual feeling about balloons may, in itself, be a bit off-kilter. But I assure you I am quite sane. And I am not a "looner." I am a globophile.

The bloggers will tell you that the globophiles come down to two types: poppers and non-poppers, the first getting off of balloons popping and the second getting off on balloons without popping them, and that any variations are just degrees along this continuum. Again, a vast oversimplification. It's kind of like saying that, in politics, there are liberals and conservatives, and everyone falls somewhere on the line between the two.

But as with most things in life, it's not nearly that simple. I'm what might be called a popper. I pop balloons, and I love to watch women pop balloons. But only if they pop the balloons in certain ways. I like to watch women blow up balloons until they pop. I like to watch them sit on them or squeeze them. But I really feel disappointed if a woman pops a balloon by stepping on it or sticking it with a pin or with her fingernails. And I absolutely loathe popping a balloon with a lighter or a cigarette.

And, by the way, popping balloons also scares the crap out of me. And I like to watch women do things that don't involve popping balloons, too, like cuddle them next the their breasts, or just blow them up and tie them, or stuff them into their clothing, or sit on them without popping them (which is entirely possible, in case you didn't know that).

Now there are globophiles who like nothing better than pin popping or cigarette popping or bare feet popping, or any number of methods that do nothing for me. And there are those who hate popping because it scares them, and those who hate popping even though it doesn't scare them and those who don't particularly hate popping, but just don't find it sexually gratifying.

And that's just a small taste of the great variety of interests covered by this one term, globophilia, or balloon fetishism, if you prefer. Because people with a sexual interest in toy balloons are, first and foremost, human.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Sex and Balloons

You could say that I have a fetish for toy balloons, although I prefer to say that balloons are my fetish. My sex object. Not my only sex object—I'm quite fond of women, and one in particular that I happen to be married to. But I get turned on by balloons and by watching women do things with balloons.

Weird? Perhaps, but certainly innocuous among sexual attractions, and really quite fun. If you don't "get it," if you don't understand why anyone would get off on a child's toy, then this blog is most likely not for you.

I can describe what I feel, what gets my juices flowing, what I like to do and watch, but I can't explain why any better than anyone else. I didn't wake up one day and say, "I think I'll get down and dirty with some toy balloons today. It happened, over time, gradually working its way into my consciousness as I grew from being a little boy to a teen.

And unless you have a fetish yourself (and admit that your sexual quirks might be, in fact, a fetish), you won't understand. But I didn't write this to educate or convince you. I write to satisfy the curious, communicate with the like-minded, and express my own feeling in a way that will last.

And I won't be offended if you decide to spend your reading time elsewhere. Honest.